So sick but not any more


There is one consolation in being sick; and that is the possibility that you may recover to a better state than you were ever in before.
Henry David Thoreau

After an intense time of emotional upheavals one can hit a wall. I hit mine on my way to LA and promptly got sick. As I flew to LA there were actually 3 (count them) children within arms length of my first class seat (miles baby) which I of course thought made me immune to child seat-mate attacks. No such luck. Me thinking-really 3 kids, with an oh my God look on my face, but saying sweetly, ‘Wow, what cute kids’. I found all of first class bemused by 3 1/2 hours trapped in a flying bus with us space-cramped humans, most drinking and 3 restless small diaper-wearing children. After a millisecond of reflection I thought see, karma is a …!
There we were seated drinks in hand when amidst all of the travel fury came these 3 cute babies with snotty noses and snotty hands and germs a plenty for us all to see. We sat so close that I reasoned that if I took a big breath of the airplane air they would also be breathing the same recycled air. We were all going to be breathing the same air through the entire flight oh goodie! And ‘what difference does that make you ask??’ they were sick, No this is not happening she said screaming (internally of course) into the heavens. See, karma baby! (pun intended, for all 3 of them)
But It became a moment of complete surrender. Those cute little snotty smiling faces. We knew that we had been beat. They were too cute to resist and I kept finding myself touching their little hands as they reached up to touch me. They of course were interested in touching all of us, thank you very much germ sharers. I spend too much time alone to be able to beat off this kind of germ attack. I had to face it I was getting ready to be sick. The one consolation in this type of sickness is the increased strength of the immune system. (See, Positive thinking)
Once sickness has passed through the system the body can defend itself better to any other low-lying bugs that may be skirting around. This puts older adults at a disadvantage as their immune systems suffer from lack of use and one’s defense mechanism slows with age making any small illness you may get big business to get rid of. Thanks to my 3 flying buddies I now have a mighty defense shield that other non child exposed humans have to do without. How lucky am I?
I don’t like being sick, no one does but it is along with being immune system boosting also mandatory down time. Your sick so take some time off! Watch a movie or catch up on some reading. But when I am dealing with the kind of sickness that makes you want to hide from yourself and get out of your body I can do nothing but either sit in silence or listen to music. Only music with the softest flowing kinds of rhythm. Other types of vibration like loud music, movies, or commercials on television all hurt my body too much. I had to use soothing vibrations to rest my body and my mind. At first I was lost in the pain of sickness but as the days wore on my sense of being bone weary tired continued but inside of me a time of being wide awake ensued.The vibration was doing its job.
Now I could read a little and watch a little television but too much of anything was a headache waiting to happen. So I spent a lot of time lost in thought. I thought about how we are all made of the same biological ingredients so what I breathe you breath, what you have to eat I have to eat, I want to be loved you want to be loved. I thought about how similar our wants really are. I thought about how our thoughts can make a sickness go by fast or stay and linger depending on how much down time you need or how long you have been ignoring your own body’s needs. You might be sick for a day to catch up on sleep and sick for a month to reset a depleted physical body.
Either way when the bodies energies are low the mind can assist by concentrating on positive thoughts rather than boo-hooing through your cold. Face it everyone gets sick. When I am dealing with body pain I practice moving my awareness away from my physical body concentrating instead on creating my future, visualizing what I hope will transpire, someday. (Let him be tall dark and handsome, with a job, yeah, and a sense of humor, and did I say good-looking, oh yeah and a supporter of woman’s rights, yeah, house on the beach or the city, the sensitive type but strong, wait, am I saying all of this out loud, whoops sorry!)
Anyway those days off helped me to remember how I am not living right now. I have forgotten I let a road block materialize and I found myself making excuses instead of moving it. Enough, I am sick and tired of being sick and tired. So during these the last few days of low energy but still with a crazy wakefulness I began to formulate my next step.I sense forward motion people!
I feel the sun finally bursting through the days of cloudy thinking and I am reminded that it is good to be alive. Even through difficult days there is always beauty somewhere for me especially on the face of my grandson.
I can bask in the moment knowing I am not so sick any more, yeah…

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