Recovering from my near death experience (she’s a drama queen) prompted by the flu I have gained a fresh perspective on something going on in my life. As a teacher there is this push inside of me to do ‘the right’ thing, whatever that is. It is important for me to be real, to walk my talk. In every moment I try to keep my eyes up and forward to shed the light of wisdom on what is going on. I try to look for the bigger picture in every event that happens. It is a lot of work to keep different aspects of my life from becoming personal and affecting me physically. You know like it just did, she types while reaching for a kleenex.

Through my spiritual work I have come to understand and I mean I have a very deep knowing that the things that are happening in our lives are dual in nature. They are both lessons for the person the event is happening to and lessons for those who have to watch it play out. It is very hard to watch societies killing each other and no less watching loved ones being self-destructive. It can be difficult to maintain the strength to keep an eye on the bigger picture when all you want to do is take over the situation and make it better, or at the very least make it stop. As if you could!

It is a funny thing with humans, you can tell them exactly what is going to happen if they perform a specific action and watch them do it any way. It is as if you are speaking another language to them. Their ears become deaf to your words of wisdom and in those moments comes the real test of faith. I think this is the reason one of the first steps in alcoholics anonymous is to recognize that there is a power greater than ourselves and this is the issue right here. Sometimes we humans get involved in things that are in the end spiritual issues way beyond our understanding and/or our business whether it be in our family or in the world. Our greatest need is to be working at our own liberation. Let go and let God lest he turn his mighty gaze in your direction. I don’t need my house bursting into flames…

How does anyone think to know the mind of God? And really, can there be only one interpretation of the one God, only one way to live a righteous life when there are so many different faces of man and man’s experience across the wide world? Why is simple logic so hard for humans? A dog will not pass an electric fence line because it understands the consequence but a human will go back and forth across an electric issue in their lives and wonder what the hell that pain is all about and is there a pill that would take the pain away. People will blame their neighbors nationality or lack of nationality for the ills of their country and sometimes they are not even living in their own country. Right now with a presidential election coming there is so much finger-pointing and denial it is embarrassing to watch the unfolding story of he said, he said, he promised, he failed. They can say what they want we are the ones who suffer.

As I continue my hunt for the great mystical truths I find that it is said over and over again, that the kingdom of God is within us. When we search the world over for the answers that drive our heart we are in effect running away from ourselves and from God. When we begin the search for wisdom worshiping at the altar of our own hearts then the real work of the spiritual human can begin. Until you realize that everything around you is a story developed for your growth you will continue to get caught in the trap of believing the story you are living is the truth. Think back in history and remember to what we humans have ‘believed’ across time. The only ‘real’ truth is ‘your’ truth. This truth of yours has been gathered by the events of your life. So when someone claims to understand your plight when you can see the silver spoon hanging out of their mouths, ask them how could that be? Know thy self!

What we know is our experience. How we grow is in how we react to the experiences of our lives. I cried bitter tears when my son called repeating again the same old story. This time I held the line of my word and right in the face of fear and through my tears. I went into meditation and reached out to him through the light. Instead of screaming I went into silence and was louder than I have ever been.

When the light comes on inside of the Self there is no cloud that can cover its rays. When the small self can adjust to the larger Self there is no stopping the Self. They are merged as one. When all of the selves on the planet each look inside to their ‘Self’ rather than believe the chatter of the outside world everything will get quiet. Once the earth is quiet then the light of wisdom will once again move across the still waters giving us peace on Earth.

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