Funny how life becomes a teacher when everything you need to know about yourself is revealed in the moment your dog tears up your special something, or your child displays disruptive behavior, or your partner embarrasses the hell out of you. Lose your cool and you will find a lesson ready to be learned right there in front of your red screaming face. We can get mad blaming this or that when things go wrong never thinking to check our reaction to a circumstance that is most likely out of our or anyone’s control. Things often go wrong in our lives presenting as lessons in self-control, perspective and self-reliance.
Don’t like it when things go wrong? Ask yourself; Who do you think you are? Why shouldn’t bad things happen to you? Are you anymore special than him or her or them? More importantly, What do your reactions tell me about who you are?
Do you get mad when you trip in public? Do you have such control of yourself at work but allow yourself to get completely out of control in social situations? Do you act spiritual at spiritual times and like an SOB when behind closed doors? Do you act supportive to your loved ones with a dark and jealous heart? Do you turn a blind eye and a deaf ear at anything at anytime for any reason? Do you know that you are doing something against your own soul but do it any way? Do you keep your true self locked in a box because “‘it’s just safer that way”? Are you living your life at all? or Are you hiding behind someone’s coattails? Is the reason you are so pissy and mad really someone’s fault?
Face it, we all hate looking in the mirror and we all have shadow stuff that needs to be uncovered. Equally, we all have to do the work and come on, nobody really wants to but the exit to easy street is a well guarded secret. Plus the reality is life will often reveal our weaknesses and our underwear to everyone every where while we think we’re doing a great job covering our asses. Life is full of life lessons and lots are embarrassing some horrible. Life is hard. And?
Life is hard and you have to learn to dig deep. There is no easy way to approach a difficult life or a difficult time but head on. The victim trains runs for miles and miles but the stops are all the same and get this, there is no destination. That train will take you right back to where you started. In order to turn things around you have to dig deep, do the work and shut up! Most of us sit in our privileged lives unaware of what other humans are having to put up with on a daily basis. There are horrifying stories and atrocities that are unimaginable to us, and we cannot get off the couch and pull it together. People we need to tell ourselves and each other its time to stand up do the work- The victim train has left the station.
I have found perspective to be a great teacher in times of frustration. Someone cuts me off in traffic-there is an emergency in their family. Someone takes my parking space-they are in a hurry and I needed the exercise. The receptionist doesn’t have my reservation-goodie, room upgrade. Driving across the country in a Uhaul pulling a trailer with a full size car and hating every minute of it-better than the person stuck on the side of the road in a Uhaul not pulling its trailer. It can always be worse. It can always get worse. Sometimes it does. And then- usually- at some point- it gets better.
When blinded by the red color of rage, when surrounded by doubt and fear, when plagued by victim-ness, stop drop and roll. Stop your line of thinking, Drop your attention to your breath and Roll your consciousness back towards gratefulness and away from selfishness. Remember it can always be worse, it can always get worse. When you dig deep within your being you will find a river of peace and understanding that will help you get through difficult times. When you dig deep getting upset becomes a thing of the past. When you dig deep you become the person you were meant to be. When we get past the, Why do I always have to be the bigger person? and just be the bigger person, you will walk towards the understanding of why it is so important. Someone has to be…
Digging deep within the self for answers opens the gateway to true wisdom. It reveals what is happening around you rather than leaving you lost thinking about what is happening to you. This thought changes everything and it leads to self-reliance and peace. Dig deep people!