There is a terrible precedent that is set in childhood because we are easily manipulated by our circumstances and our families. It’s the first learning curve, who do I trust as we watch ourselves manipulate for another cookie, a later curfew, some extra dollars. At the same time we ourselves are being manipulated by those around us, I’ll take you shopping if you do this, I’ll buy a toy if you’ll be good. Manipulation is a skill. It has also been a survivor skill taught to many young girls as a way to navigate the shark infested waters of a man filled zone. It becomes so easy for people to manipulate their way through life they forget it is a skill and not the truth. It becomes second nature but as in all things truth comes to those who are looking out their eyes desiring the right path rather than those who grow up to be players, blatantly manipulating everything and everyone.
When we fall into someones trap of manipulation it hurts and feels bad especially if the one doing the manipulation is so obviously manipulating you like you don’t have a brain in your head, frankly many don’t. Everyone does it. It is a behavior that has to be managed. It is also an act that can bring karma right to your door. We manipulate because we don’t like the truth or we know that what we desire is wrong in some way. The saying the truth will set you free is correct but who wants to turn in money found on the street, tell someone to quit lying to their spouse. We end up manipulating the truth as much as we manipulate to hide the truth. Again, the truth will set you free but it also might make people mad, really mad.
I don’t like being manipulated. I have been told to do things for the greater good that were out-and-out lies meant to get my money. I have been manipulated into someones bed who did not have my best interest at heart though they would proclaim their love. I have been manipulated by teachers claiming to know what was better for me than the truth I desired even when it hurt to know it. Peoples reactions are often manipulating tactics to get you to do what they want. No one wants to upset or disappoint someone they love but the money you give a drug addict for “rent” is either going up their nose or into a pipe, quit kidding yourself. Alcoholics manipulate, drug addicts, children, parents, friends, lovers, its horrifying and definitely a skill that no one wants to talk about because everyone is doing it.
The only truth is found in your heart. A parent will allow a child to manipulate as a oh isn’t that funny, but if you don’t call them on it eventually your car wont be in the garage and money will be missing. If we don’t hold people to tell the truth they wont, why would they when the skill you allowed to develop is used so easily. How will you answer you child when they tell you, you do it why can’t I?
I hate writing these kind of blogs they are the most under read because the truth is, no one wants to hear the truth. We all want the get out of jail card that we are each willing to give each other just so no one says anything. If your friend catches you cheating you expect them to keep their mouth shut, they will manipulate their way to an excuse. Think of the hedge fund managers who manipulated their way in to pocket books across the world. People we love and trust, politicians, pastors, teachers, you name it, are manipulating everything, its horrifying.
The only recourse is to live with your heart open so you will see the truth and not be used by someones version of the truth. The more you manipulate to get your way is the amount of manipulating that will happen to you. Believe me, you will not like the day so and so said this that or the other, just to get what they wanted, it will feel like shit. Speak your truth stay close to your truth and fix what you yourself broke through the manipulation of the truth.