Meditate more!


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The path of the human is that of constant meditation. Whatever your mind is  focused on becomes your meditation. Focused on what you don’t have, focused on being to fat or thin, big or small, rich or poor, all of those thoughts become your meditation and your reality. The truth is we are all meditating all of the time. We either fill our heads with directed thoughts of positivity, healthy visualizations or we are drowning in our thoughts of lack, unhappiness and whose fault is this anyway. The smart person puts the words meditate more in to their brain and then uses their tools to direct their thoughts and at the very least learns to quiet the mind if for no other reason than to give ourselves a break from the running commentary going on in our heads.

Parmahansa Yogananda said that the best meditation was to keep the word God on the tip of your tongue, in your head repeat the word God over and over again, God God God God God, every second. He said that the word God is a word of high power and vibration and that through repeating the word we could bring this higher vibration into our selves. Resonating a higher vibration increases light into the physical vessel bringing vitality and prosperity. Now I tell that to people, eyes glass over, heard it a thousand times, be spiritual and something will happen. They turn and continue walking down their road of darkness and insecurity.

Meditate more! Our thoughts of lack and rehearsed pain growing stronger with each repetition create a wall in our minds, a wall of our own making. This wall makes sure our lives are full of lack and a repeat of the constant pain we keep rehearsing, keeping the light out and the darkness of ignorance in. Changing our thinking to include the repetition of a higher vibrating thought or word lifts us from the burrowed thought channels carved in our minds. We can create new pathways that lift our mood and change our lives. That’s right, just with the repetition of a word.

Meditate more! I talk to spiritual people all of the time. it becomes rote to say we mediate to become one with God and the world around us yet these same people who know better are playing the same sound track in their head not truly understanding what it is to be one with God. That sentence scares them this ultimate truth that we are one with God. Meditate more! Because it’s the truth our true and rightful journey is not towards some earthly goal, it is to know with certainty that we are walking in a vessel containing the original spark of light and life, that is God, it’s right their in your heart, really right now, it’s inside of you! Cool right!

Meditate more! Make your thinking world more of your friend. This was the intent of meditation to regain control of our mind. The brain we can see and chemically change with pills, but the mind is a wild animal that invades your world, never seen, constantly controlling you. Yet, through right meditation it can be tamed and can I hear an amen!

Meditate more using words of higher vibration, get weird about saying the word God, say love, say light, say Jesus, Buddha, find a word that works for you and try it for a few days and see if the constant repetition of a higher vibration word helps move your thinking to a more restful and peaceful state.

Change your life, Meditate more!

Pause


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To me the pause button is the most important function on the remote. I just need the movie or music to stop for a bit. I don’t need to start over. I don’t want to stop because restarting means trying to find where I was when I stopped. All I want is to pause mostly for bathroom breaks sometimes because the phone rang. I just need to pause. If I pause to long the machine will stop but at least I had the option of just pausing. It is also easy to get things going again just hit play.

Life needs a pause button. Sometimes we need to step back for a bit and really look at what’s going on. Too many times people will come to a complete stop and turn their life ship around midstream because fear of the unknown became to great. Retreat! the mind says when really you just needed to pause. A brief review of your intentions can bring the direction of your life ship back on steady course. Panic is never a good course correction idea. Which makes me think of every scary movie when the scary thing occurs and instead of being still or running for cover, they head to the basement to check the noise or run full on right into the chainsaw. Pause for a second people, let’s quit freaking out.

Now a good pause button when used allows the perspective you need to gather your wits and continue. It also will allow you to see what is real and maybe you do need to hit the stop button and restart in a new direction. Cool thing about the pause button you can hit it again and again without interrupting the flow of the narrative. This allows for careful stepping on your life path when you become unsure. Face it we all become unsure at some point. Do I leave him/her or not? Do I take this job or not? Pause take a break feel yourself into the answer, reactions make for poor choices. Pause think and continue!

Problem with some pause buttons is the endless pause. Button pushed, light flashes, endlessly… That is not helpful one must make a decision, take a stand, move forward. That is how life works,and this is how we learn by moving forward. But when fear becomes overwhelming and the apparent endless mistakes of our lives get the best of us many reach for the pause button and sit down when they should have hit the stop and restarted. Depression is a sign of a pause button gone wrong. You have to hit play to keep life going. Life lived on pause is not a life at all.

Many people will ht that button and give up on ever being able to move forward again, why bother… But life even filled with mistakes is better than a life not lived. They (who ever they are) really mean it when they say its all about the life lessons. Nothing makes you more you than having gone through the BS you have gone through and the results of having been down the hard luck road. How do your children get the strength to take on the world if you yourself live in fear with your pause button pressed afraid to go on?

So use your pause button in times of stress. Take the time you need to recharge so you know you are making good decisions. Take time to feel into your heart. Make sure the time you are spending fills your soul and remember you might need to change directions. Again if you hate your job you will take that lovely energy right back to your house for your family to enjoy, please save us all the misery. In the spiritual tradition we say do what you love and love what you do. Nothing else matters, all the details of life get taking care of one way or another. My favorite way to see things in perspective is to understand if you drop dead right now someone will be in your house, others will have your things and someone else will do your job. Life is but a drop in the bucket of time.

Never let the dissatisfaction of your life be the banner you wear. We see you bitter face. Take time to pause and make a better choice for yourself. Then hit play and live your life with passion!

 

 

 

Gettin my cry on!


imagesI have been extra sad lately. Animal rescue videos are making me cry my eyes out, returning vet videos especially the ones with kids, crying, sobbing, Oh my God what is going on! So much sadness makes walking amongst the people extra hard as my eyes get red and I can’t see, I keep my head down but frankly its hard to hide the fact you are crying, past the I have something in my eye lie.

So as I’m walking I begin to take stock in what could be going on. Then I remembered its June. June is a difficult month, my Mom died in June, and after a hard break up I went to Costa Rica in June to cry it out. I spent a month in a resort alone, as in no other guests it was off-season, just so I could scream into the ocean without anyone having to watch me suffering from heartbreak. There’s more but suffice it to say its a time fraught with reasons to cry. Mom used to call them grief surges.

In our aura are all the trapped traumas of our lives. Any emotion that has not been properly dealt with sits in the aura and will be revisited for resolution. There is a constant move in the universe for balance and unspent emotion has to be balanced or it has the possibility of turning into dis-ease or at the very least making us sick. But often we forget why we are upset at certain times thinking we are just having a bad day when the reality is much bigger and the situation an opportunity for growth.

When we remember that we are moving through a time when in previous years we have had difficulty it is very much like walking through a hologram of your life. So when I get to June my body of pain remembers all to well what happened in another June and my body of pain wants to react where the wisdom part of me wants to release this bundle of trapped energy keeping me down.

I realized I had a few things to cry about and with consciousness we can cry it out with the understanding we are releasing trapped emotion and not banking more sorrow to have to process at a later date. It was no fun to go through it the first or second or third time but through increased wisdom and the awareness that all things are as they shall be, we can cry it out leaving the energy to transform and not stagnant. There is nothing wrong with crying its a useful thing. It’s the wallowing in sorrow that’s the problem. Use a crying session brought on for whatever reason to clear your trapped emotional baggage.

Sometimes when I know its coming, the I feel sad and need to cry sensation, I will put on certain music and boom bundle of tears. I allow the tears to flow with the intention of release. Aww it feels good to cry, it feels good to get out, it just  doesn’t look that good and beware of dog poop because then the crying changes from sorrow to why didn’t I see that, poo on the shoe, boo!

Cry it out people, then let it go and let God deal with the rest!

Gifts, ask and ye shall receive


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I went walking by the beach this morning allowing the water to wash away my stress. I have loved walking by the ocean since I was young and being here in Santa Monica is such a great gift me. I love the Ocean.

The beach itself is mostly devoid of shells and is smooth for walking. Yesterday I had fun looking for beach glass just something to do while strolling along. Today was different as each day is. I have big things on my mind and my monkey mind can go and go. So I started chanting to keep myself present. Then I started to greet every person that I walked by half them never even looked up yet I kept going saying hi.

I started having this incredible feeling of expansion in my chest. And then I noticed the feathers. Before my Mom died she told us to look for feathers and that would the sign she was with us. Every third step there was another feather. A beach devoid of shells and rocks one feather after another, I took notice.

As I was walking feeling my mom experiencing that peace I asked for a gift thinking some beach glass would be awesome. I kept walking and there it was, a beautiful intact sand dollar. I use to collect these in Florida as a child and later in Florida you could find broken ones all the time but here I had not seen one ever. Until today. What a gift, a beautiful gift. Even small requests can be expanded as we will sometimes ask for so little when our creator desires to give us so much. Lets stay open to the possibility of greater gifts than we can ever imagine.

God is great!

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Disappointment is a bitter pill, don’t swallow it


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Awww disappointment! Receiving or experiencing disappointment is a tough thing for us humans. As soon as it happens it can become a cascading event of bad feelings whether the disappointment is coming from something that was done or left undone, it just doesn’t matter it becomes a doorway to negativity. One that must stay shut. Studying spirituality being religious any of the good feeling projects on the Earth move into a fog of forgetting when we experience disappointment. We become at once lost in our emotions of attachment and I am owed, I was used, I will never get what they get. All part of the game of life and learning what is actually important. Being, right? Being, being a being, not an emotional monster that can’t think straight or stay on the righteous path creating negativity and karma that has to be repaid.

Disappointment is part of life unfortunately, but its a great life lesson. When we expect people to be a certain way that is judgement. When we expect God to treat us a certain way, that is expectation, when we expect those around us not to hurt us, that is attachment. The feelings and actions of those around us is their karma and part of their life journey. Most of the time disappointment is about wanting what you want when you want it. News flash, not going to happen. The best we can do is stay in a place of neutrality understanding there is a bigger story going on than what we understand. You know what they say hindsight is 20/20. There is a reason for that. Life teaches that, that which we don’t understand is something to let go of and let God deal with. Like tragedies and horror on the planet, dear God take it away but for so many hard-headed humans terror and horror is the only language that can change them. God’s work is way passed our understanding.

What I do know and have learned is that when we walk in faith of a greater story, then we can be assured of a greater ending than what we see or are capable of seeing. Jesus spoke parable after parable on the unfairness of life from a human perspective. A wealthy man hires workers for his field and the last hired receive the same pay as the first, they scream unfair we worked longer and the landowner says we made an agreement. When we look around us and do comparisons of any kind is to put yourself in a dangerous position of thinking you know. One has to remember no one knows the mind of God. The universe is also always in a state of balance nothing goes unnoticed.

Disappointment is a false thing, a mind trap meant to keep us in the dark of emotional turmoil when the answer is simply be glad for all that good things that happen to those around you. Be glad that you see God at work. Be happy and uplifting, for those without Divine spiritual awareness see little outside of their eyes than that which benefits them. When we accept with grace everything that is happening to us in our lives, taking steps when necessary to correct that which is wrong towards that which is right, disappointment becomes a great teacher. Do not be a judge unless you are yourself without sin. When the master spoke of how hard it was for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven, he was speaking of our inability to be grateful for what we have and who gave it to us because when we are not believe me that which is in charge will know it and balance will be restored.

When disappointment comes, breath in, let it wash over you like a wave and then release it. You know the saying let go and let God! Soon disappointment will leave and your blessings will reappear. Spend a day blessing everyone and watch how it changes your perspective, you know your blessed, that’s air your breathing right? You are alive, that is a blessing!

let’s talk about love


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Let’s talk about love.

Full Definition of LOVE

1
a (1) :  strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties <maternal love for a child> (2) :  attraction based on sexual desire :  affection and tenderness felt by lovers (3) :  affection based on admiration, benevolence, or common interests <love for his old schoolmates>

b :  an assurance of affection <give her my love>

2
:  warm attachment, enthusiasm, or devotion <love of the sea>
3
a :  the object of attachment, devotion, or admiration <baseball was his first love>

b (1) :  a beloved person :  darling —often used as a term of endearment (2) British —used as an informal term of address

4
a :  unselfish loyal and benevolent concern for the good of another: as (1) :  the fatherly concern of God for humankind (2) :  brotherly concern for others

b :  a person’s adoration of God

5
:  a god or personification of love
6
:  an amorous episode :  love affair
7
:  the sexual embrace :  copulation
8
:  a score of zero (as in tennis)
9
capitalized Christian Science :  god
All of that they say is love, with sexual desire as number 2, funny isn’t it. There is a misconception about love I fear, a full on thought of love as a warm and fuzzy experience. We have people saying they love each other even when they don’t or using the word love as a, I like you right now, kind of thing. We talk about God’s love but if you mention any form of God’s anger they will quickly change the subject. How do they define that as love?
My mother and I had a very difficult relationship and really my mother did not have a good definition for love. Her mother gave her away as a child so how could she see or understand love? For her love hurt. So that was how it was instilled in me and frankly that was my experience of love, completely condition, you were loved if you were worthy of love. I just didn’t get it until my children were born and later when my son traveled a dark road I realized there was nothing that could move my love from him.
Just a few days ago I was in the space of a woman speaking of her difficulty with her son. I spoke as a mother of such a difficult boy, but she quickly cut me off telling me her son was a heroin user and thus couldn’t be her son any longer. My heart broke for her and her son because mine was too. At 18 she sends him away. Where is her love and why was her fear more important? When my boy spun out of control I grabbed him even harder. I know that love is gross and disgusting sometimes, horrifying and scary. Think of the worse person you can think of, gross horrible, God loves that person. God does not see love as a warm and fuzzy thing. For God love is a verb. Big lesson for us all, especially the judgmental.
I once told my daughter-in-law she had to learn the mother voice. It is the way a mother can stop their child on a dime as they are walking into danger. When I was a young mother my voice could penetrate my children, ask my 33-year-old bi-polar son, it stills has the same effect even today. As a mother I instilled the fear of God, ok me, into them it was my way of letting them know my love was strong enough to step in front of a train or go to hell and get them if need be. Same as God’s love for humanity, the disgusting humans who would hurt others are still loved by God.
Let’s redefine love as the unconditional acceptance of that in you which is greater than your small human self. God loves us just as we are and as we realize that love, our hearts open and we are never the same. To love a disgusting human will allow you to see the child in them, that being that has felt unloved and uncared for and under the watchful eye of love will turn around. Every human desires love, true love, unconditional love. But make no mistake I can love you while screaming at you, God can love you while pulling your life apart. No one said love was always sweet but true love is such a balm for the heart even the ignorant know that.
Go on and show love to your people, be the one who loves “that” person though everyone else will send them away. Love with such a heart that can’t be moved. Now that is power, that is love.

All is well


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I am at a very interesting point in my pursuit of a spiritual path, a path of truth. I have gotten to that point where the knowledge I have found is working its way into my daily life and without thinking I am not reacting but accessing and then acting. Not all of the time, way to human for that, yet…

It is unrealistic to think we will not get pissed off. Even the most enlightened being you can think of is going to get overwhelmed with this play called humanity. Humans are as they are and really we cannot expect any different, said with such disappointment…

But, all is well.

Now here is another idea that can help me past the bullshit I see. I am a doer. If I see an injustice I will speak up. When someone mistreats their child in front of me, I say something. When a partner belittles their partner in front of me, its my eyes they see while their partner is looking down. I have not always thought all is well. As a matter of fact I have thought humanity way past well and sick as hell.

That is a view that doesn’t see beyond to creators will. My mistake was in thinking that free will had a bigger role than it actually does. We are all free to fu*k up our lives as much as we wish and for lots of people it’s the suffering they endure because of their fu*k ups that finally turns them towards the light of a spiritual path. But what had been lost in translation is that everything that is happening is happening as planed. Just as Jesus told Peter he would deny him 3 times, Peter was shocked, “who me”? But when the time came Peter’s free will did deny Jesus 3 times. It was part of the story all along.

When we who walk a spiritual path make every step with the divine in mind we are doing God’s work. It can be a hardship to turn and look at humanity that seems hell-bent on destroying everything on God’s green earth and the inhabitants there in, it becomes for me a need to wear blinders before I am screaming, “destroy us, we know exactly what we are doing and just don’t give a shit anymore”.

I wonder how the movie Noah is going to do? But God made a promise not to do that again so I guess I am going to have to get the phrase all is well firmly planted in my head. God wishes us to look through eyes that know all is well. Look around long enough, live long enough, suffer long enough, and you will get that all is well. Though it sometimes doesn’t look like it or feel like it or even remotely seem like it, all is well.

The big creator in the sky has this story already locked down and it seems God is not into tragic outcomes though a good story always has plenty of tragedy in it. But like a good Hollywood movie usually a good outcome is assured, or frankly who would go. Even in the worst of circumstances we find a silver lining to stories and events and learn that indeed all is well.

It’s a statement of faith. It’s a statement of maturity. It’s a statement given by God. Can’t argue with that. So when Oprah asks me what I know for sure, I am going to say, what I know for sure and beyond any doubt but will stumble to remember over and over again, is that all is well. All is well!

 

Giving in not giving up


It has been said a thousand times that to change you have to do the work. You can’t buy your way out or through it. You can’t wish it away. You can’t really avoid it because anything you are putting off is gaining momentum in the astral plane. This is one of the things I learned when I was very ill. My teacher told me that to truly heal one had to understand the underlying issue that was manifesting. Just like anorexia is not an I hate food thing its an I hate myself thing, the only way to cure it would be intense self-love therapy, something frankly we all could use. We move issues around in our head until we come up with a reasonable explanation rather than the truth. My relationship is bad must be his/her fault, no matter my parents hated each other and I have no idea what love means, its what’s her/his face’s issues and baggage. Will we never look in the mirror?

I recently had an encounter with someone in my past who has taken great issue with me. This person pointed out over and over again what they and their posse thought were my issues and went on to identify their rightness. Of course I played along as my human side became very active. But as I look over the incident the truth was just sitting there under the surface but under no circumstances was this person willing to see, right makes might after all. A fight I was never going to win and to allow this person the upper hand would have simply played into their very unfocused life view. That’s their business not mine. How awesome to take the time to really see rather than engage, of course I engaged first, so fuc*ing human am I still.

My teacher says that our problems come from our emotions and once triggered we then react. Like a pot needing to be stirred before it bubbles over, once we see the issue we need to look for truth, save the reacting for something that is real. Our lives are run by the amount of reaction we give all of our little and insignificant problems. Play this game when you get pissed off, if I was going to die in 6 months would this idiot and their issue even be a concern, probably not, death is the great equalizer and nothing pulls perspective like remembering your death is imminent, and it is, face it and then begin to really live.

I am often disgusted by the amount of wasted time around bull shit issues that are meaningless in the material world of constant suffering. I watch people react every chance they get which leads that person to react, then that person, before long everyone is reacting and no one remembers why. We lose our consciousness and forget our true self as soon as human natures takes center stage and begins messing with your mind and the truth, why bother. One teacher said if you stub your toe and we all hate stubbing our toe, be glad that was all the karmic adjustment that was necessary, better than breaking a hip. The world is in a state of balance you shoot off at the mouth that sentence will be back to haunt you.

For you on the karma is not real bench, if I have an accident it was just an accident, I would say look over your life and get back to me, that’s not the bank of the river denile your living on, you are swimming in its waters. Cause and effect the most base of the natural laws is kicking the hell out of everyone you see and like a truck rolling down hill without breaks its just gets faster and more powerful as it rolls and prepare yourself it’s getting ready to roll over you.

We do spiritual work to clue us in on things like this. We have to stop trying to get the upper hand over someone, more karma, we have to stop trying to look better than someone, karma, take from someone, more karma, be shitty to someone, more karma. We need to give in to the idea that the peace that passes all understanding comes when we sit in our truth and we don’t do anything to mess with it like say reacting over the idiot who just pulled out in front of you, more karma. Give in to the notion of just letting everything be but never give up on remembering who you are and who is really in charge. When it is time to react for the righteous cause you will know because the ego will not be involved. We are so much wiser than we give ourselves credit for, we need to access that wisdom and learn to shut up. Whew…

A true spiritual student


To my fellow yogi brothers and sisters, in my humbleness I wanted to share some thoughts with you about what my teacher means to me, and how I feel this gives me a responsibility in return for his service. There have been many master teachers on the planet and we are very fortunate to have a true spiritual teacher in our midst. To do our teacher the greatest of service is to gratefully receive this gift and be a true spiritual student eager to do our work in return. To show our heartfelt thanks towards our master is to follow the teachings with purity of heart and be ready to stand as a lit candle on the path so that others may find their way. To accept fully that we have a true spiritual master in our midst is to be a collective of true spiritual students successfully living the blessings of students of the divine spiritual wisdom. He has lit the path before us it is our duty as his students to do the same for others.

To be blessed with a teacher is a karmic signpost of how much spiritual work we may have done in a previous life and makes finding a true spiritual teacher a great privilege. To show our gratitude for such a gift is walking the path as a true spiritual student, dedicated to being a lighthouse monitoring our egos in service to humanity. The student of divine spiritual wisdom is asked to review their daily activities through the lens of the divine. As you review your day constantly asking the question, did I do the best I could? Could I have done better? Looking at the self and its responses through the neutral viewpoint of the teachings of the divine spiritual wisdom ever willing to grow. We restore karma by right living, even more by righteous living.

As a true spiritual student our manner should precede us as our lives reflect the gift of being a student. As representatives of our teachings our speech even when doing the smallest of jobs shall be filled with uplifting words not those of jealousy or callousness. Our words are filled with the energy of who we are and when spoken speaks of your belief system that which lies unconsciously inside you. Our spiritual growth is reflected by spoken word, through our choice of words and as a true spiritual student they will be filled with light.

When we make appointments or attend classes, when we are standing in line or suffering from any of life’s vagaries we constantly reflect the consciousness of a true spiritual student. We would never think of taking up someone’s time, wasting our own time, we would never appear lazy or ungrateful for the gift that changes our life from fate to destiny. Being a student of the divine spiritual wisdom is learning the keys needed to unlock life’s apparent mysteries. The true spiritual student radiates this knowledge and is a lighthouse to the path. They probably wouldn’t be gossiping or acting in any kind of demeaning manner.

As a true spiritual student we do our work on our own our time. Our joy of being in class together is being united in our energy to feel a greater sense of self. In class we aid in lifting the energy up making it easier on our teacher who is shouldering the entire class. Who are we to cause our teacher even a ripple in his energetic flow? The true spiritual student sits eager to help those students who they can feel need assistance, why be a lighthouse if you are not using your light to aide those around you? Admire your own light long enough and you will be blind and lose your way. We are led on the path by the lighthouse’s who have walked the path before us our job as true spiritual students is to shine our light not bask in someone else’s. If we want to bask in the light of the teacher we should shine with the light of God.

When we are in class we give our attention to our teacher not chattering amongst ourselves.  What could we have to say to each other when in the space of the teacher sharing his word? Who would talk keeping another from being able to hear? Who would look to their phone in class? Who would text? What could be so important and if it is why haven’t you left the room? Why can you not stay in class? Why do you get up making the teacher look up? Why when you speak must everyone look? A true spiritual student knows the sacredness of the teachings and shows proper respect. We think it matters little but look to the karma in your life and think again. When in class be a respectful student.

When we walk the path of a true spiritual student following the teachings given by a true spiritual teacher we will find our lives filled with Gods blessing. As a true spiritual students working to reunite with God who can stand against us and as students of a true spiritual master who are we not to walk our path shining in our manner filled with gratitude. Our teacher and the teachings have blessed thousands of students; it is our job to see to it being even greater numbers. We are living in thrilling times of profound change and are so blessed to have a teacher to guide us let us each on our spiritual walk shine with this blessing.

My life has been profoundly blessed because of my teacher and learning the divine spiritual wisdom. I cannot imagine a world where everyone could not have this blessing. Let us each rejoice and be the very best students we can be both making our teacher proud and being the messengers of God’s light we are asked to be.

You want me to be grateful for what?


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As part of my ongoing spiritual walk I ever so often have to begin again in order to make the necessary adjustments to rise to the next level, whether it be a level of consciousness, or stage of life. The in between stage of growth is where I find myself having the hardest time. The in between state of no longer being where I was and not yet where I am going.

I chant as apart of my spiritual practice and have for over 15 years. I find working the vibration through chanting the most effective way to exact change on the physical level. Awesome! Then comes the day that you realize your practice has become less awe-inspiring and then I change it up. I think of a spiritual practice like a conversation, not always the same but also a sharing between beings. Like all things a spiritual practice that becomes rote is no longer a practice but a habit. A true spiritual practice moves and changes with you just like a conversation moves and changes. We move our practice in order to move the self. I needed to know what to do to change, to get ready for the next spiritual growth spurt.

I went to a class with my teacher having a difficult time with the struggle of life not knowing where I am going and he says practice being grateful. Of course I jump up with the “of course I am grateful”, “I am so grateful for everything I just don’t get why it has to be so hard sometimes.”

Now we know there is no growth without the pain of change. In order to change we have to work our vibration releasing the old inviting in the new. So he told me “you aren’t being grateful for everything.” ” Of course I am, it’s just so hard”blah blah blah

Swimming in the misery of the struggle oh why God why me? He says, “Are you grateful for the struggle? Are you grateful for the confusion you are surrounded by? Are you truly grateful for everything the good and the bad? “Are you grateful for the challenges that are moving you down the path of greater spiritual growth?” “Are you grateful that in this moment you are indeed closer to God?”

I went back to my place to really understand gratefulness on a much wider scale. To be grateful for some of the most difficult things that have happened to me. To be grateful for the hard humans who I have relationships with. To be grateful for the tragedies that have befallen me and my family. And in that moment you see the hand of God for what it is , a hand, help, growth, and movement. Through the adversities of life I scream out to God, through the pain in my life I have searched for God and through all the loss of my life I have found God.

There can be gratefulness in horror when you open your eyes to the widest vision you can imagine for each event in your life, good or bad. Gratefulness is one of the most profound spiritual practices, giving you perspective and frankly it leads to forgiveness, and we all could use some of that.

So I am grateful for every difficult moment, for every happy moment, for everything that has ever pissed me off, and especially to all the things that make me sing. I am grateful!!!! For as I become my very best self, shining like a sun, I know there is nothing more powerful than I Am and certainly nothing powerful enough to bring me down. How can you not be grateful for that? I will practice being grateful.

I am grateful for you!